B̶i̶t̶c̶h̶ Beach Rant

so for everyone who hasn't been here before (you probably haven't because how), this is the blog I started when I found out that I'm a FLEX'12-13 finalist to keep all my memories ans experiences so I could always come back and relive all of it. let's face it, you can't always trust memory. I got really attached to it and I've always liked writing and now I need a way (one of many) to keep my English 'large and in charge' haha but I came back from US already so now I'm going to write... I'm just going to write. it's one of the few things I'm good at.

one of my latest adventures was a 10-day vacation in Greece, Rhodes. it was generally awesome. the sun was shining constantly and it's important because vacation somewhere like this requires a helluva lot laying on the beach. our beach was located in the one of the most beautiful places I've ever witnessed - Ladikou bay. you just look at that. those rocks you're seeing? they're 50 meters down on the bottom. that's how clear the water is. 

but I was bored anyway. 'cause that's the kind of person I'm and, you know, lying on the beach gets old. that's when I started looking around me and, honestly, it was a mistake. 

there are a lot of people on the beach that make questionable decisions. but when you see them, you don't think "oh, you are wrong". you think "oh, you're f*cking stupid no-ot sma-a-art". 

first of all, I'd like to talk about that part of our population that can't think for themselves yet. children. especially newborn infants that get dragged to the beach by their clueless parents in the most dangerous hours of the day. your child is 3 weeks old. for the mother of God, sit at home for a while! even the inscription on my sunblocking cream reminded me not to bring a baby under two months to the beach. you do. and you expose it to the sun and, in the lost cases, throw it in the water. i'm reporting child abuse, seriously. and you can make me especially happy if you dress you child in some kind of clothes. not like you have to make me happy but you probably care about your kid and on the beach you can get sand in the places on your body you didn't even know existed and it's not like you child can tell you where yet. so yeah. 

when you're done with your child, take a look at yourself. sunblocking cream was invented for a reason. I once observed a woman sunbathing for 5 straight hours, from 12 until I left the beach, and I never saw her use the protection. her back was pretty much fuchsia color and I only imagine how high the percentage of skin cancer possibility went. and while we're onto that, DO NOT IN THOUSAND YEARS TAKE OFF YOUR BRA ON THE BEACH UNLESS YOU'RE IN THE SHADES. I'm fucking delighted that you're so comfortable with yourself and women's breasts are absolutely amazing that's why you don't want to get breast cancer and get them removed. please please please. this is very serious stuff and ugh. please do not. 

and finally. if you're smoking on the beach, I'll kill you and make it look like suicide. you can poison yourself all you want by yourself but do not do it on the beach. unless it's pot and you have a really serious case of glaucoma. 

so, if you don't consider the above-mentioned, my vacation was pretty great. even though it might be too many plane flights in one year :)